Its become something of a buzz word or term over the last couple of years hasn’t it? Mindfulness. Being mindful. Living mindfully. I kind of got the concept but never really thought about it any more than that. At least not consciously. Then last year when I began my Year of Living Seasonally project and started thinking about what that meant for me, I realised that some of it anyway was about mindfulness. Or living in the moment. And that is something I have never been very good at. My blog is titled Musings and Chatterings of a busy mind for a reason – I find it incredibly hard to switch my mind off and just BE. I’m always either looking back and thinking about the past (that’s the historian in me) or making plans, lists and starting projects for the future. As I am now firmly in my middle age (and proud of it) I can look back over probably 30 years of being that way and understand why at times my brain almost aches with tiredness. So its time to slow down – or at least stop from time to time and just be.
Of course life doesn’t always go according to plan and I have caught myself lapsing into old habits over the last few weeks. This weekend (I’m writing this on a Sunday night), the three of us have had a rotten cold. Its just a cold, nothing serious, but we all know how miserable a cold can make you feel. Its especially hard on Fionnuala who is unable to understand why she feels rotten and is equally unable to communicate exactly what she wants or needs. Add to that a mother who has never been a good patient and who has very little innate patience and you can imagine there’s been a few tetchy moments in this house today! Thankfully my husband remains a beacon of levelheadedness and calm and separates us when we are driving each other mad. I have felt bad today for occasionally being a bit short with our little girl and have been trying to remind myself to stop and breathe deeply before I say something. (It hasn’t always worked)
Instead of beating myself up over it, I thought about it for a while and decided this was a good opportunity to practise a bit of mindfulness. So when a fellow blogger, Aisling from Babysteps posted about doing a linky on mindfulness, it seemed like the universe was telling me something! So – mindfulness. I admit I find it hard to practise at times. Having a child with special needs has made me look at the world in a different way that’s for sure, and yes it does make me slow down. A lot of things now have to be done at Fionnuala’s pace. But I have to force myself at times to just be rather than always be doing. One thing that I find works is to wander around our garden and just look, listen, smell and observe. The last couple of days have been rather inclement to say the least, but I did manage to get outside for a while earlier and amongst the snow, I found these
Spring is coming, its time to stop and breathe and just be. Thanks Aisling for the timely reminder! You can see her post on this here